...it's not in my hands...

Sometimes my ego gets in the way of things.

Tonight a certain untalented person messed up a few great songs at a basketball game. I always do my best not to screw up and I'm sure he does too- but he still does where I generally don't.

It shouldn't be a big deal. I shouldn't care that this guy can't play the instrument he's been learning for YEARS the right way. I shouldn't have to have times when I want to go crazy because I'm surrounded by even crazier people.

But it is, I do, and I definitely do.

I don't know what causes me to react so angrily after every pep band game. Maybe the thought that I can do better, the thought that he should BE better. The thought that he can be just as condescending as I am (I need to work on that) but have no real ethos ("right") to do so!

I had to give him a ride home. It's humbling to know that even when all is said and done I still have to be the good person people think I am. I really didn't want to. I wanted to say "You suck, get your lazy mother to do it!" (we called her and she ducked out of it.) I wanted to just punch him and tell him I never want to be associated with him.

My good side took over in the end. I'm glad, it's who I want to be.

I gave him a ride and didn't make any mention to his faults unless I first acknowledged my own mistakes. I took the high road and gave him his ride home. Good me knows that everybody is just as important as everybody else no matter how much they suck at drumming. Good me wants people to like him and not to hurt other people.

Good me is who I strive to be, but sometimes I don't like being him.

It's hard to be nice to people, and hard (for me) to be humble.

To end this happily: The band was ok, and we did alright. I played my best and the girl's basketball team won by one point. All in all it was a victory.

A victory for our team, for our band, and for Good Me. That jerk :P